ESL 91
FALL, 2001
IN CLASS ESSAYS:
SOCIOLOGY

Students wrote these essays in class. Students were responsible for editing and revising subsequent drafts of these in class essays with minimal help from the teacher.

ESSAY TOPIC: According to the text "Socialization and Culture" in your book Interdisciplinary English, there are four agents of socialization: the family, the school, the peer group, and the media. Which of these four agents played the major role in the process of your socialization?

Pascale
Claudine
Daniel
Haseeb
Stanley
Marie G.


Pascale-Andree Felix

ESL 91

Fall, 2001

 

Most people think that society or the media are the agents of Socialization that really important. But it seems like they forget the most important of the agents, the family agent. Without this agent we couldn't have a society.

 

I was most affected by the family agent of socialization. When I was a little girl, I always thought that all I could do was play with my Barbies or my cousin.  That’s all that I wanted to do when I was five years old.  My mother made me sit on her lap and she started to explain to me who I was.  She said that I wasn’t born in a rich family, that I was supposed to go to school to get a diploma, to have a better life.  She told me where I came from, what the society expected me to do or to have, and at last what she wanted me to be.

 

She explained to me what life is.  She wanted me to be someone with a name.  Even if wasn’t born in a rich family, when people saw me they could see someone of value who went to school and also knows what she is doing.  My mother made me understand that I have to go to school for me first and then for her.  If I become a doctor or a nurse or someone with a good title I will make her proud when she is talking to someone about who I became.  My mother always reminded me that if I need something I should work for it.  If I saw that someone has something, I should not have the desire to have it too.  I should be satisfied with what I have because this is mine.  My mother had a good influence on me, and even now she still does.     

 

The reason that I don't mention my father is because he was in NY at this time.  So I stayed with my mother.  She is my role model.  I always wanted to be like my mom, because she is someone that people can look up to. If today I can be who I am it is because of her.  I have respect for people and I know what is mine.  For all the things that she taught me I thank her and I thank God for blessing me in this way.  She is the strongest, hardest, worker that I have ever known.  And the best thing is she is my mom.  Some people can have a mother, but not like mine.  She went to work at 4:30 just to pay my school, when my father was here in NY having fun.

 

I don't think that there are a lot of mothers who prefer to sacrifice themselves for their children regardless what this child might become tomorrow.  But my mother was someone else.  My mother made me her primary concern.       

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Claudine Mondesir

ESL 91

Fall, 2001

My agent

 

I was most affected by the family agent of socialization. My family played a very important role in my life. They provided me with a lot of things that I needed in my future. They taught me the way to behave in public and also gave me my religion and culture.

 

My family means a lot to me they made me become the lady that I am today . When I was little, they taught me all of the manners that I need now. The most important is the way to behave in society. For example, if I go to a restaurant, I am not supposed to lie on the table .I need to sit comfortable like every one else .I am not supposed to put my hands behind the other chair or shake my legs under the table. If I am eating something, I am supposed to use the correct hand .I have to used my knife and fork properly. Also, in public I need to dress properly .If I dress with a short skirt, my parents will tell me to take it off, that it is too short to go outside. I agree because now there are many people wearing indecent clothes. They don’t cover themselves, and you can see almost their whole body. Some of them may wear a short t-shirt and skirt. You can see their breasts and legs. I think human beings are not supposed to walk and dress that way.

 

My religion is very important to my family and me. Every Sunday I have to go to church even if I am sick because God is the only one who can protect me. This task is still part of my attitude. I have to go to church to pray to the Lord. I think it is very good to for everybody to teach their child to go to church. The child needs to know that there is some one who protect him/her everywhere he /she goes.

 

Culture is important for my family and me. I learn the value of my culture and our food from my family. I like the way my mother cooks rice; it taste very good .I like vegetables, fish corn with beans; they very good and they are important for me because I have to know all kinds of things in my culture. And I think every body should all kinds of things from their culture .MY mother cooks in a special way which reflects Haitian culture, the culture of my country for example, when my mother cooked rice with beans, she first cooked the beans. Then she mixed the spices, garlic black pepper and salt .She pit all spices in the oil until they were cooked. She put the beans, for a few minutes and put the water left from the beans. She added some butter, green pepper, olives and boiled the water .She added the rice and left it until it cooked. This is one of our national recipes, and it shows how unique our culture is. I am grateful to my family that I was able to learn it. However, we also like other food that is not part of our culture. Music is also a part of culture that I started enjoying with the help of my family. Kompak is the name off a type of Haitian music that uses the guitar and piano etc. It’s often played or sung as a story . The singers send some message to every body to make them feel good and enjoy it. My culture is the best one for me and I am proud of my culture.

 

My family was an agent that made a great impact on me. They taught me the good manners I need in the society. They taught me my religion and made me believe in good, and taught me how to pray. They made me enjoy and understand the importance of appreciating other cultures as well as my own.

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Daniel Calixte
ESL 91
Fall, 2001

My Agent

Many years ago I was affected by each of four agents of socialization: The family agent, the school, the peer group and the mass media. But I was most affected by the family agent of socialization. The family agent of socialization was the most important agent for me because it was the first agent that I grew up with.

Without this agent I couldn’t have the kind of education that I have now. When I was a young boy, my mother was the first person who taught me how to behave in the society. My mother always made me understand that life was not the way that I really saw it. Sometimes, you might want something and you think it is easy to get, but in reality it’s not as you think. She told me that some people might make us believe that life was easy, but in fact that wasn’t true at all, you have to work very hard to get what you want. Then my mother began to explain to me where I come from, what life was really like.

My mother wanted me to go to school to have a diploma, to have a better life. Even if she wasn’t rich and she didn’t have a billion dollars, she gave me something that was much more important than money. This was something that, even if I had all the money in the world, I still couldn’t buy it. She gave me a good education. She made a lot of sacrifices for me just to make me be someone that the society could accept.

I remember that my mother used to wake up at 4:30 AM every morning to prepare food for me before I went to school and also before she went to work. She cared about me like no one else cared. Before I went to school, she reminded me that I shouldn’t take anything that was not for me at school. When I saw those other students disrespecting the teachers, I should remember who I was and what kind of education I had. Although I had a father, my mother was the only one who had an influence on me. They always say “ like father like son,” but this statement was not for me. My father was in NY and I was in Haiti with my mother, so he didn’t really have an influence on me.

My mother always wanted to make me happy. Even when I did something wrong, she didn’t beat me. She made me sit on her and she talked to me about what I did wrong, and whether I did it on purpose. She always believed in me; she wanted me to be someone with some good qualities. She wanted me to be a doctor or someone of value so that I could help her, myself and other people.

Today I can control myself and I know how to behave when I sit or do something in a group of people. It is because of my mother. I have been taught by a good role model. I have been getting some results and the results are positive. Here is one of the results and this one is the best. During the time that I was growing up, my mother was always telling me that people shouldn’t talk in the society unless they have permission to do so. I always remember what she taught when I was a little child about talking in the society.  It helping me now, because when I’m in a meeting at work or a school meeting for my children I always remember my mother.    

I always said that if someday I will have to choose a woman to be my wife, she will need to be like “mom” because my mom is the best wife and mother that a man could ask for. With her understanding, caring, loving and personality, a man could not ask for or want anything more.

To conclude, there are a lot of mothers out there. But is really difficult to find mothers like mine because she made me her primary concern. She didn’t care about herself because she wanted to take good care of my needs. I don’t think that there are a lot of mothers like my mother, who prefer not to enjoy life because of their sacrifices for their child. Sometimes when there was a party or when someone invited her to a party to have some fun, my mother wasn’t able to go because of me. My mother did a lot for me as the first agent of socialization in my life. My mom was not interested in having fun, but in sacrificing herself for me. She always thinking about my future, my education was the thing first to her. I thank God for giving me a blessed mother to take care of me.       

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Haseeb Razaq
ESL 91
Fall, 2001

My Agent

According to the reading “socialization and culture”, there are four agents that play role in the child’s socialization. These four agents are the family, the school, the peer group, and the media.  I was most affected by my family agent of socialization because it is the first and the most long-lasting intimate social relationship that I ever formed. Family can identify race, religion, social class, and gender.   My family has been and is always there for me since I was born. 

The family agent is most important to me because when I was born, they gave me my name and my social class.  They also gave me the same religion and beliefs that they had.  Family is important because they are always there for me whenever I need them.  For example, when I was a baby, my mom took care of me when I was sleeping, eating and playing.  She made sure I was sleeping well and always worried when I got sick, even if it was a mild fever.  She changed my clothes and took me to the school.

When I was growing up, my family brought me a lot of things for school.  They paid for my books and school tuition.  My family helped me in difficult situations.  For example, when I needed money for something, I just asked them and they used to give it to me as long as I was using the money for the right purpose. Like, money to buy books for school, to buy clothes, and money for transportation (commuting). They also gave me a certain amount of money everyday to buy food for lunch.  It’s also very helpful to have parents like mine because they pay the rent for the apartment that we live in and pay all the bills.  I always thank God for giving me such a great family because some people don’t even have any family, and they don’t have these kinds of advantages. 

I really don’t do much to help my parents financially because I am trying to focus on my education and getting a good job.  However, I will always know that I am not walking on my journey on my own because I have my family to help me in any way possible.  Now it’s my plan to work hard to get a good job and start helping my family by giving them money and supporting them like they did with me. They did a lot for me, and I now should help to pay back.

My family didn’t only help me financially. However, they were always there for me in the bad time. For example, if I was having trouble with my teachers, friends or any other situation, they would talk it out with me and advise me on what to do and what not to do. Some people find it annoying when their parents give them advice and stop them from doing certain things.  However, I think it’s very helpful and we should all listen to our parents because they would never want something bad for us.  Also, our parents know all the situations we might go through. Because they went through the same things when they were our age, so they understand more and better. 

My family members are like my friends.  I will never forget the love and support they have given me and still give me. They always ask me everyday: How did things go today?  Is there anything we can do to make things better?  This teaches me to do the same with my children when I have them. It will prevent them from hanging out, dropping school, or getting addicted to drugs when they have problems. Instead, they will come and talk to me about it.

In conclusion I think family is a pleasure God has given to people.  Those who have families should really take advantage of those helpful and supportive people because they are blood related.  I really think nobody would even come close to helping me like my family did.  My love will never fade towards my family members.  I always remember them in my prayers, and I’ m sure they always remember me in theirs. Even though school has helped me to learn, however, I think that I wouldn’t have been in school without the help of my family.  For that reason, I think family agent of socialization will always be most important to me. 

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Hau Tak Stanley Chan
ESL 91
Fall, 2001

According to our reading, “Socialization and Culture,” the agents of socialization are very important for every person. There are 4 different agents of socialization. They include the family, school, peers, and the mass media. Members of each group influence other members in the group in terms of behavior and ideas. If I had to pick a group that was the most influential for me, I would choose peers.

My family is different from normal families. My family members include my mother, my grandfather and me. That is a single parent family. I did not have any brothers or sisters. When I was a child studying in primary school, I always felt bored. I always came home by myself. When I stayed home, nobody would talk to me. I felt so lonely when I played video games at home. So everyday after school, I would always go out and play with my friends. At that time, I did not know what was good or bad. I just did not want to be bored. I did not want to stay at home. My mother was not always at home. She always worked. Sometimes when she did come home, she looked very tired. We did not have much time to talk together. We always went out on weekends, but sometimes I did not want to go. I did not have a sense of freedom in her presence. I preferred to play with my friends more than stay with my mother. At the time I was still a child. I could not control anything, but I knew what I wanted to do in my heart.

A few years later, I went on to secondary school. I had a bit more freedom. I had some pocket money. I always stayed out until 10:00pm. I liked staying in billiard halls and video game centers. Those places had a lot of bad people hanging about. Nonetheless I still wanted to go. Why? Because these places were exciting, fun, and stopped me from being bored. Could I have chosen another way to stop being bored? Yes, but I did not have any idea. If people let me join their group, I would join them. I was still afraid that other people would not play with me. I did not judge whether it was good or bad. In every group, there must be a leader. Others would copy behavior and ideas from this leader. I also follow others people learn from the leader. At that time my student report was very bad. Each year when my mother went to my school to get my student report and listen to the teacher about what I did in school, she always got upset. She was upset about my behavior and worried about my future. Each time my mother saw the teachers, she ended up telling me that if I kept that life, I would turn into a loser. She told me I would not find a good job and would not be able to earn money. At that point, I did not have any thoughts about my future. I just thought my mother worried too much.

After I came to New York, I had a job. The job was programmer assistant. I did not find this by myself. At that time I could not find any job because my school reports were very bad and had comments of disapproval from teachers. So my mother sent me to her friend’s company to work. My boss Eric was a good person. He taught me a lot about computer technologies. The first time we made contact, he did not like me. He did not like my image. It took us a few months to get to know each other. He told me one day that if I wanted to succeed in the future, I must go back to school and get good reports. Otherwise, it would be very hard for me to succeed in life. I thought about what he said. I spoke to my mother about what I wanted. My mother was very supportive of my goals. At that time, I studied in an international school in Hong Kong. In this school I found more new friends. They were very hard working on their studies and they kept the rule on their behavior. After school, they always stayed in the library to study. At the beginning, I did not feel comfortable hanging out with them. A month later, I really joined them to study. At that moment I did not understand why I would do that. But one thing that was true was that if I joined this group, it would have some response to change my ideas. Of course, at that time I could judge what was right and what was wrong.    

When I think back on that time, I always feel so stupid having wasted so much time and put myself in danger. Although I wish I could go back to my childhood, that time is gone. I cannot get it back. I feel so sorry for my mother because she always worried about me and tried to help me out to have good behavior. So when I have my own family and children, I will spend more time and pay more attention to the friends that my children make. I can see if they have good or bad behavior. I will design the relationship with my children like a friendship. I hope that will make it easy for them to understand the difference between good and bad. I hope my children can grow up in a good environment, and I will give anything to support them. So peer group is so important to family and friend relationship. That will help people to understand their children think.

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Marie Geneus
ESL 91
Fall, 2001

According to the reading “Socialization and Culture,” the four agents of socialization are Family, Peers, School, and mass media. Those four agents play an important role in the child’s Socialization. For me, Family is the most important thing in my life. I was most influenced by my mother and brothers. My mother and brothers have always been there for me. They always have had a positive influence on me.

My mother is one of the nicest people in the world. From the day I was born until now, she has made me feel special. She helped me with my homework. She always spent time to comfort and encourage me. I remember, when I was 9 years olds I had a bad cold. I was sad, I stayed home, and I could not play outside. My mom took the day off to stay with me. She made me soup. We played cards. She gave me medication and she cheered me up. My mother taught me that day, how to be caring, grateful patient and affectionate with others.

My mother is a hard worker. I did not have a father, so she supported a family of 4 people. She was always working hard, and she never asks my father or any one for money. My mother is a responsible person. She gives me a place to live, food to eat and clothes. She always provided me with everything that I wanted. That, on the other hand never made me feel different in comparison with other children.

At an early age, she put me in school, because my mother felt an education is very important. She always encouraged me to finish my high school, go to college, and get a degree. She always said people who have a degree, go further in life and she wanted the best for me. She had to support herself and her family and she had to make sure that I was able to do that for myself when the time came. She encouraged me at school to work hard and have a good profession to depend on myself.

My two older brothers are Pierre Michel and Pierre Richard. They are very different to each other. P. Michel is very serious, very responsible, and he likes to help anyone at any time. He’s the older than me, he is like a father to me. In contrast, P. Richard is a little bit lazy, is very egocentric. He just think about himself, he doesn’t care about anybody else. But he’s always been my favorite, because we have a bond together, and we are almost the same age. Furthermore, he has a great deal of charm, and when I am sad, he can make me laugh. I always thought of them as my friends. When I was younger, I did not have many friends. But I always had my brothers. We played, shared, studied, and watched T.V together. Sometimes we made dinner or went to see movies. Sometimes we spent a lot time talking to each other. We also yelled and fought. But always remain friends, then again that’s part of being siblings. They always give me good advice, and protect me like a father would protect his child. They taught me to respect anyone that I came in contact with, especially men. I learned how to share with others as well.

According to the reading “Socialization and Culture,” there are four agents that play a role in a child’s socialization. I talked about my family because this is the agent that most influenced my life.

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