Natalya |
Olesya |
Juna 1 |
Juna 2 |
Natalya
Shmay
ESL 91
Spring, 2002
Essay Topic: Which of the four agents of socialization do
you believe is most important in the development of the child? Explain your answer through
examples from your experience, your observation of others and/or your reading
What is
socialization? How does socialization influence the child, and what are the agents
of socialization? Socialization is the process that helps the infant gradually
become a knowledgeable person, skilled in the ways of the culture into which he
or she is born. Also, socialization has four basic agents: family, school,
peers and the mass media. These agents have their own roles in our life.
The mass
media are important elements of communication that influence our behaviors and
actions because we usually spend a lot of time watching TV, reading newspapers,
or playing computer games. These media sometimes provide positive as well as
negative influences.
The peer
relationship is a social group with the same age and social background. That
group formalizes some special society that helps to maintain close friendly
connections through life. In the book “ Gender Play,” Barrie Thorne
explained how the peer relationship teaches gender roles. So, peers have a
great influence on the child because they are social actors who create their
social world.
Another
socializing agent is the school. School gives children a formal process to be
quiet in class, to be punctual with lessons and observe rules of school
discipline. Children are required to see authority in the teacher. The peer
group is often formed in the school.
In my
opinion, the most important agent of socialization for the development of the
child is the family. Family is the mirror of society where child gets the first
understanding about norms and morals. Between family and child exists an
invisible connection that makes a close relationship, and normally family is
the most important authority institute for the child. So, I would like to show some basic points why family is the main
socializing agency for the child.
First of
all, family is the most important institute for the child because family has
the responsibility to care about their baby, and try to teach him how they were
taught by their mother and father before. Primarily, family gives the child
family tradition and hopes that their child will continue that tradition in the
future, as in a family business. For example, I know a man who became a doctor
because all men in his family work as doctors. He told me that in childhood his
father taught him to love that occupation because it was the best job in the
world to treat people. So, his work was influenced by his family because it was
a tradition for a man to be a doctor.
Religion is
the second point why family is the main socializing agency for the child. In
fact, family does not ask their small baby what kind of religion she or he
wants to follow. The child’s religion is already determined before he or she is
born because the child’s mother and father, grandmother and grandfather all
have that religion. The child will see how his family celebrates religious
holidays, and he will repeat the same action, which he has seen. As a result,
the family gives some belief for their child that will live in his heart during
his life.
Gender socialization also plays an important role in how children learn gender roles. For example, we can see how mothers usually dress up their infants. If it is a girl they wear pink clothes, or if it is a boy everything is blue. The toys, pictures, books, and television programs with which young children come into contact all show us differences between male and female attributes. Toy stores and mail order catalogues usually categorize their products by gender. For example, toy kittens and rabbits are recommended for girls; lion and tigers are seen for boys. Why? All toys provide some characters and behaviors that will influence the child in the future. For example, I guess you remember how children play in the home or kindergarten. Girls play roles like mother; boys play like father. So, I saw how two girls disputed who would be father for their dolls. Finally, one girl said, “I can not be father and neither can you because girls always must be mother. It says mother for me.” So, the family teaches the child what role a woman or man plays in society, and what rules a woman or man should know. For example, women should be womanly and soft, and men should be manly and strong, and never cry because just women can cry.
So, we can see that family is the most import the agent of socialization for a child’s development because family helps the children to understand the world better. Also, family puts in the child’s head the basic knowledge that the child will use in the future. When children become adults, they add to the foundation provided by their family through their experience in school or by communication with peers or from the mass media. Family is the world that usually gives us a feeling of sunshine in our heart and reminds us of people who love us and take care of us, their children.
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Olesya Glebova
ESL 91
Spring, 2002
Essay Topic: Which of the four agents of socialization do you believe is most important in the development of the child? Explain your answer through examples from your experience, your observation of others and/or your reading.
The agents of socialization include
four stages of our society such as: family, school, peers, and the mass media.
I think that the most important agent in our society is family because without
this agent we could not have a society at all. Parents give the basic knowledge
and explain to their own children during childhood that children should respect
themselves and other people. Moreover, parents show and explain good manners and
values of life to their children.
I cannot imagine living my life
without my family because family is very important and valuable to me. Without
my family, a large part of my life and culture would be missing. I know I can
always get help and support when I need it from my family. In fact, I think
that this is the most important thing that my family taught me- that a family
is made up of people who you can trust and who love you no matter what.
Today we can read a lot of articles from newspapers and see different
kinds of TV shows about families where parents abuse their own children,
verbally and physically. I think that these parents do not realize that when
their children grow up they might treat and raise their children in the same
way because these people learned that way when they were teenagers or younger.
I was so lucky because I learned differently and my family always cares about
me, and I care about my family.
I remember when I came to the United States of America, in a little
while I went to school. On my first day of school, I was very nervous because I
did not know the language and was old enough to go alone without my parents. In
addition, I was very scared because there would be no one who I would know at
school. Before I left home, my mother and father tried to calm me and explain
to me that I had to go to school anyway. Moreover, they gave me the positive
examples such as: I would meet new people in the school and these people can
become my friends. Also, they told me that I would be learning a new language
because without it I cannot communicate with people. I saw that my parents were
nervous that day also because they could understand my feelings and they knew
that the school system is totally different in the United States than where I
came from. And they could understand that it could be possible that the
adaptation would be very hard for me.
Additionally, I would like to add that family and relatives are very
close with each other and provide a support system for each other and for the
children. I believe that most of the families in our society spend every
holiday and often times every weekend with each other because all of them are
very important members of the family. In addition, I would like to say that my
belief based on my family example; my parents put problems that they may have
been having in their marriage away so that their children would grow up in a
loving home. Mothers and fathers are home for their children to help them with
their homework or just to spend time with them. Grandparents are also around to
help out their grandchildren and children. For the most important part,
families provide a warm, safe haven for children grow up.
In conclusion, I will like to write that when I get married and leave my parents house, I would miss my parents a lot. I do not know exactly what I will miss most about my family. I know that I will miss the constant love and care, the feeling of having someone there for me, someone to talk to, to someone to come home to. I always have someone to turn to in my family, whenever I feel sad, angry, or scared. I can always depend on them because they would never let me down. I just hope that I can do the same someday for my own family.
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Juna Lucas
ESL 91
Spring, 2002
Essay Topic: Which of the four agents of socialization do you believe is most important in the development of the child? Explain your answer through examples from your experience, your observation of others and/or your reading.
Socialization is the scientific
study of human behavior and activities.
It is concerned with how human beings think and act as social creatures.
Socialization is the process through which we become human. It is through our interaction with society
that we learn what is necessary to live in each society.
There
are four agents of socialization: family, school, peers, and mass media. Among these agents I believe that family is
the most important to the child’s development. Why? Family is the most important to the child’s development, because
in family we learn self-concept (within the family) we also learn the basics of
who we are. Family is the best arrangement for bringing up children to be
mature. What is a family exactly?
Family is the oldest institution
on earth, and it plays a vital role in human society. The book “The Secret of Family Happiness published by the Watchtower
Bible and Tract Society of N.Y says, “ Throughout history, strong families have
helped to make strong societies”. Most
families consist of a father, a mother, and children. Grandparents may live in their own households as long as they can. While contact is kept up with more distant relatives,
responsibilities toward these are limited.
Today especially it’s not easy
rearing children. Nevertheless, many have
done it with success. In many homes
around the world, men view child preparing or training as woman’s work. True, the word of God points to the father’s
role as the principal breadwinner.
However, it also says that he has responsibilities in the home. (prov24:27) In God’s view, fathers and mothers are partners in child
training.
What
is discipline? A magazine published by
Watchtower Bible and Tract Society of N.Y says, “ Discipline is training that
corrects the mind and Heart.” Children need discipline constantly. Yes, parents should discipline in love as
God does. Reasoning can convey
discipline based on love. Parents
should bear in mind that disciplining their children does not involve merely
speaking to them in threatening tones, scolding them, or even insulting
them. But it involves recognizing the
need for firmness and trying to keep these words in mind when disciplining
their children.
Sometimes,
though, reasoning is not enough, and some kind of punishment may be needed. In
the Young People Ask answers that work, from the chapter “Train your
child from infancy” says, some are not “ corrected by mere words”. For them, the punishment administered for
disobedience may be lifesaving; for example when a child gets punished because
he/she was crossing the street without any adult surveillance. Whether, talked
to her that was nothing. “ Discipline in no way endorses angry whipping or
severe beating, which bruises and even injures a child” according to the book
Secret Family Happiness
Different
children require different kinds of discipline. Also when parents punish Their children, the child should
understand why he is being punished. If
not, the Child will repeat the same thing again because he didn’t know why he
was punished.
I
remember when I was a little girl around eight to ten years old. My mother
didn’t want me to play with certain children on my Neighborhood. For me it was
unfair because those children were like me.
When She saw that I didn’t want to listen she called me and talked to
me. And she told me the Reason why she
didn’t want me to play with those children.
Anyway, what she said wasn’t interesting to me. My mother wasn’t the kind of person who
liked to beat her children. So, what
she did hurt me (she pretended to ignore me) because I felt that, I was missing
something in my life. Now by growing up
I realize the reason I felt like that.
Children like when their parents give them attention. As in my case,
children don’t want to be rejected. As
the magazine Awake published by Watch Tower says “parental discipline, in
whatever appropriate form, should never leave a child feeling rejected. Rather,
the child should sense that discipline is given because the parent is with him
on his side”.
“A child feels secure in a happy family”,
says the mother in the Show 7th
Heaven on WB 11, I remember my grandfather always said, “a family is a haven of
safety and security”. Envision the
ideal family for a moment. During their evening meal, caring parents sit with
their children and discuss the events of the day. Children chatter excitedly as they tell their father and mother
about what happened at school. This
time spent together refreshes everyone for another day in the world
outside. Also in a happy family
children know that the father and mother will care for them when they get sick;
they know that they can go to their father and mother with their problems and
get advice and support. The children feel safe no matter what
happens in the outside the world.
In conclusion,
parents are most important to the child’s development. Parents should teach children to fit in and
belong. This means that exceptional parents do everything to prepare their
child for life. Parents should help their children make good friends; and allow
them to clearly express their feelings, thoughts, and needs. Parents need to be good listeners and be proud
of their children, both at home and in public. In that way we could say that
family is the most important influence on the child’s development.
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Juna Lucas
ESL 91
Spring, 2002
Essay Topic: Think of a time when you changed your behavior to conform to the group. Describe the situation in detail. How old were you? What type of group was it? How did you feel at the time? Looking back, how do you feel about your actions? Would you behave in the same way today? Why/Why Not?
Conformity is a type of social interaction in which an
individual group. Adapts behavior to
fit the behavior of the group. Peer pressure has a lot to do with conformity
because people change their behavior either for the worse or the better.
Because, of a group that they want to please, and just because they don’t want
to be left out.
Some people are more conforming than others, but most people conform to the expectations of some group most of the time. Life without this type of social interaction could not exist. This means that without conformity there could be no culture.
Here in America I have had many experiences with conformity in a group. At one time or another, someone (like myself) had to behave like the rest of the group in order to fit in. I was twenty-one years old when I came here. I had brought a CD player to listen to my favorite Haitian songs. One day one of my peers asked me “What music is it that you are enjoying so much?” “It is Haitian music” I replied. Then, to my surprise he insulted my taste in music. Ever since that day I started buying American music, so no one else would laugh at me as he did. Now I am older and wiser than before, when I look back, I think that I shouldn’t have changed the music I listened to for another music, just because I wanted to act like everyone else. I no longer behave to please a crowd or group, but only to please myself.
However, There are some times that I change my behavior.
This time it was about my accent. Because I came to the United States at such a late age, it was very
difficult for me to speak the language without strong accent. I remember one day, after a year of being in
the United States, as I was entering my friend’s building, a stranger asked me
a question. Right after I answered his
question he asked me if I was Haitian and I said yes. Then I asked him why he asked me that question and he replied,
“you sound Haitian,” I was a little shocked because I don’t recall having an
accent when I spoke English. I was so
embarrassed about that because I knew that it was hard for me to speak the
language, but I did not know that I had an accent. Then I thought to myself that I should make more of an effort to
sound like an American. I did not want
to get offended because of my accent.
Thus, I consider the fact that I am trying so hard to fit in
a group as peer pressure. Because at time I would feel like an outsider just
because I don’t speak like a real American.
I was thinking that if I did sound like an American, I would feel better
and be more like everybody else. I
never really thought that there was something wrong with me trying to speak
like an American. As a matter of fact I
think it urged me more to learn and speak proper English.
I think that I would still have the same idea today because
I think that most people don’t like hearing that they have an accent when they
are speaking a language that is not their own.
I personally do not want to be categorized as a “just come” as they call
it nowadays. I would still feel bad
about it if someone told me that I have an accent. In this case I would always try my best to fit in, no matter
what.
I do think that wanting to change your behavior in order to
conform to that of another group is wrong most of the time because it is
important to think about pleasing yourself, doing what you like and what you
want. It depends though on why you are changing your behavior and what you are
changing to. If it is for a trivial
reason and you are changing your behavior for the worse, then it is wrong. But if it is for an important reason, then I
do not see anything wrong with it.
I changed my taste of music just because I was offended and
wanted to fit in. I felt the need to work hard on my English language because I
did not want to sound like a “just come.” If it were today I would never change
my taste of music just because someone did not like what I was listening to and
did not appreciate my culture. We are living in a diverse country where there
are many different cultures. So, I
would not change my taste because of an inconsiderate of person. I think changing my behavior about my
accent, and trying to get rid of it is not bad at all. This is the positive part about conforming
to the group, conformity is not always bad, but it can also have positive
results.
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